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Category Archives: you can’t make this shit up
Paper straws are weird, and require dead trees instead of dead dinosaurs, so how are they more eco-friendly than plastic ones?
So last night, I went out to the movies. I purchased a diet cola at the concession stand, as one does if one feels like sipping a diet cola while watching a movie at the movie theatre.
I looked at the straw dispenser, and to my dismay, it contained colourful but opaque straws which looked unlike any I’ve ever encountered, and I realized when I took one that it was made of paper.
At least I had a straw – I’m fortunate to not live somewhere where such are now banned – but what the hey?
Weird texture and mouthfeel, and I feared if I didn’t drink my beverage fast enough, it would become soggy and lose its structural integrity, despite feeling far more solid than a plastic straw. If this gal’s account is accurate, it’s a legit fear:
Unfortunately, although these paper straws are cute, definitively so, they aren’t exactly practical.
You’ve been there: your super adorable paper straw looks cute in your drink initially but it slowly becomes gummy as you suck on it, and starts falling apart, distorting the drink’s flavor. Gross.
And I got to thinking, if we’re so concerned about ‘carbon footprints’ blah blah blah, is it really superior to kill trees to make paper straws than harvesting dead dinosaur remains to make plastic ones?
A few months ago, our creative director responsible for branding the ERLC’s logo on various clothing items such as polo shirts or jackets was informed by a nationally-known brand that the ERLC’s mission did not align with their corporate values, and we were prohibited from putting our logo on their clothing. To put it bluntly, the Ethics and Religious Liberty Commission, an entity of the Southern Baptist Convention, was unabashedly discriminated against.
When our creative director walked into my office to notify me of this, my first response was to smile. Why? Because the ERLC had been the victim of discrimination, and I knew an opportunity like this meant the ERLC could pursue the moral high ground. What progressivism does to dissenters, we would not do to them.
I’m not going to identify what the particular brand was that discriminated against the ERLC, because the ERLC is not looking to score points against this particular company nor are we looking to file any type of lawsuit.
Another option was available: Avail ourselves of the hundreds or thousands of other companies that would be willing to take our money in exchange for their product. We did.
If the ERLC were on the side of righteousness, they’d recognize we are in a cultural war, and eschew that ‘moral high ground’ bullshit, and take that clothing company to court and force them to live or die by the standards their own side has created.
But of course, since they are Soros’ tools, they’ll do what he orders, which is to lose ‘with honor’ blah blah blah.