We used to say “sticks and stones may break my bones, but names will never hurt me”, but apparently we don’t uphold that as something to strive for. (I know, slurs do cause emotional pain. But you should strive to not let them hurt you, but dismiss them and the person who hurls them at you, considering the source.)
There have of course been many actual cases of outright murder, through stabbing or shooting, as well as beating like this, in response to be called that word.
People act as if that word is a magic incantation that causes those so called to lose all control of themselves and lash out violently at those who say it.
No word has that power, unless one lets it.
In which case, the problem is with that person, more than the one who insulted them.