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Woman’s Logic: Bikini vs. Underwear

17 Jun

I’ve noticed this strange dichotomy, and I’ve never understood why when the same amount and portion of skin is being shown, they’ll feel self-conscious in underwear, but not in a bikini…

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Bikini Vs Underware - Woman's Logic

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20 Comments

Posted by on June 17, 2014 in humour, on the lighter side

 

20 responses to “Woman’s Logic: Bikini vs. Underwear

  1. Sanne

    June 18, 2014 at 3:48 am

    Well, it’s not only women who think so. How many men prefer their wives wearing bikini but would have a fit should some strange man see her in her underwear? We are taught to associate bikinis with wholesome entertainment and sport, while underwear is considered overtly sexual hence dirty.

     
  2. Will S.

    June 18, 2014 at 8:15 am

    True enough.

    Yeah, indeed, I guess it’s all about conditioning.

    I’m old-fashioned enough that were I married, I’d prefer NOT to have my wife in a bikini at the beach. But most men in the West today are not like that…

     
  3. Agapoula

    June 23, 2014 at 3:32 pm

    Hah! I am in Europe and there are men who do not mind for their wives to go topless on the beach. (meaning their boobies out! ) I can not understand why, but the beach just make it not count, according to most women and some men also. Very odd.

    The people to change this will be women, going to the beach in modest swim suits, and maybe it will set a trend. 😀 .

     
  4. Agapoula

    June 23, 2014 at 3:34 pm

    http://www.reyswimwear.com/products/marie-in-tangerine

    This is good site for modest swim wear in America.

    For European women, try http://www.modestkini.com. 🙂 .

     
  5. Will S.

    June 23, 2014 at 5:39 pm

    Do teenage girls go topless on beaches in Cyprus? Do people there simply see it as non-sexual? I’ve never understood that.

     
  6. Agapoula

    June 23, 2014 at 5:54 pm

    Yes, it is quite normal. At village beach maybe 10 percent of women. At tourist beach maybe 40%.

     
  7. Will S.

    June 23, 2014 at 5:56 pm

    Ah! So, at your village beach, few locals would join in that, then.

     
  8. Agapoula

    June 23, 2014 at 5:58 pm

    I do not know if people think it is non sexual. I know men stare of course. It is only natural.

    What I do not like when they go swimming topless because there are children around, and this can be detrimental to child’s development to see topless woman walking around the beach and swimming.

    I know it is cause of jealousy of women. I feel this jealousy also. When my man goes for fishing for example, I do not like the thought of him fishing around those women. But it is not the men’s fault. Actually, it is husbands fault who let their wives to go topless at beach.

     
  9. Agapoula

    June 23, 2014 at 5:59 pm

    Yes, some locals. Last year, I saw a woman walking on the beach road with only a thong. There was a lot of traffic because every man was stopped.

     
  10. Agapoula

    June 23, 2014 at 6:03 pm

    Women say it is because they do not want tan lines.

     
  11. Will S.

    June 23, 2014 at 6:44 pm

    “What I do not like when they go swimming topless because there are children around, and this can be detrimental to child’s development to see topless woman walking around the beach and swimming.”

    Not to sound like an advocate for toplessness – I am not; I dislike public nudity, including female toplessness – but do you think children’s development is harmed that much? Interesting; I hadn’t heard about that, but if so, that is then another good reason not to have it.

    “I know it is cause of jealousy of women. I feel this jealousy also. When my man goes for fishing for example, I do not like the thought of him fishing around those women.”

    Exactly, and why shouldn’t you feel that way? I agree!

    “But it is not the men’s fault. Actually, it is husbands fault who let their wives to go topless at beach.”

    I agree – AND it’s also the wives’ fault for wanting to go topless in the first place, and doing so.

    “Yes, some locals. Last year, I saw a woman walking on the beach road with only a thong. There was a lot of traffic because every man was stopped.”

    A-ha! Advocates of public toplessness here in North America always say that breasts are completely desexualized in Europe. I was sure that was a lie, and you’ve confirmed it! After all, the world over, men are men… 🙂

    “Women say it is because they do not want tan lines.”

    Yes, they say that here too, and so they go nude in tanning booths to prevent tan lines.

    But what’s so wrong with tan lines? I think they’re kinda hot, in their own way, because, hey, if you’re a man, what could be more hot than getting to see what the rest of the world doesn’t – especially if it’s so visible? 🙂

     
    • Agapoula

      June 23, 2014 at 6:55 pm

      Yes, I think children are harmed by it. Maybe “development” is the wrong word, but I think there is some reasons why it is harmful to them.

      1. Girls will think it is normal, and that is okay to take their tops off.
      2. Children see the way men look to women’s breasts (even though natural), it cause children to become sexualised prematurely.
      3. Girls and women crave male attention, if the women getting attention are the topless women, they will also.
      4, They are something beautiful and only for spouse and breastfeeding. Topless women at the beach could also desenitize.

      🙂 .

       
  12. Will S.

    June 23, 2014 at 6:50 pm

    When I see images from here of World Nake Bike Rides and/or other displays of female toplessness (other than the Femen / Pussy Riot types, who scrawl feminist slogans over their breasts and make themselves look ugly – context does matter), I can’t help but react as a normal male does (“Breasts! Nice…”). I cannot believe that even in parts of Europe where it is common at beaches, that there are no sexual implications. Maybe in primitive cultures where they don’t do it only at beaches, but everywhere, like in parts of Africa, Latin America, the South Pacific, etc., maybe – because they’re always on display, all the time. Sure, maybe in those cultures, I can buy that. But not in cultures where you’d only see them at the beach. Even the bikini is stimulating, and as Sanne says, we’re conditioned to see the bikini as just swimwear, but lingerie, which shows the same amount of skin, as sexual. And both bikinis and lingerie are sexual, IMO.

    I wish we hadn’t gotten away from the more elaborate bathing costumes of a century ago plus, where both men and women covered their entire midsections and even partway down their legs – and even then, at that time, men and women tended to swim separately. If we could go back to that, where you’d only swim in less with your spouse, I think that would be great.

    Alas, absent a civilizational collapse and rebuilding along more conservative lines, I don’t see that happening…

     
  13. Will S.

    June 23, 2014 at 7:01 pm

    Ahhh… Okay, yes, that makes sense… I know that at very young ages, children themselves don’t like to wear swimsuits, and have to be made to; a two- or three-year-old will often tear them off before they reach the water. And that’s okay, because they’re wee ones. But yeah, beyond that, they begin to pay attention to what the grown-ups are doing, and will follow suit…

    I agree. More good reasons to not have public toplessness. 🙂

     
  14. Agapoula

    June 23, 2014 at 7:12 pm

    “A-ha! Advocates of public toplessness here in North America always say that breasts are completely desexualized in Europe. I was sure that was a lie, and you’ve confirmed it! After all, the world over, men are men… :)”

    Breasts have not become desexualised. That is very silly thing for them to believe,

    I am 100% sure of this, because I have seen many men at the beach with.. you know what, when they have been near topless woman. I do not want to say the word because it is crude. But really, it is a natural reaction for a man to have when seeing a topless woman I think! God bless them. 😦 .

    Anybody who says differently is deluded. It is normal biological response for men I believe. Even if 40% of women are topless, if a man is very attracted to one woman, it is not just going to be desexualized.

    Bikinis are also not good, though they are of course more appropiate than with out. 🙂 . There is reason for such swimsuit if you want to get a tan, and in secluded beach or swimming pool I think they are ok, if you go early when it is empty.

    Many men wear speedo’s and it is also very difficult for women.
    In the correct place and time, that is fine, but at a busy beach, it is not considerte for others. The good news is, modest swimsuits are very easy to purchase if you shop around.

     
  15. Will S.

    June 23, 2014 at 7:26 pm

    Ah, an erection. 🙂 Of course. (That’s a scientific / technical term, and not crude in my opinion, unlike say, ‘boner’, but I am delighted to encounter a woman who wants to be proper even among people she doesn’t know in person. : )

    It’s a natural reaction, indeed! 🙂 The type of reaction a man should certainly ideally have upon seeing his wife in the altogether; whereas of course men shouldn’t be seeing other women in that capacity – and women shouldn’t be inducing that state in men not their husbands, ideally, especially so casually, publicly; such ought to be considered shameful. Too bad it isn’t…

    Yes, I don’t like speedos, either; those, too, are way too sexual… Especially if a man has an erection, it will be all too visible – as you’ve noticed it can be…

    Another thing I don’t like about bikinis or even men’s trunks, is that quite apart from the sexual aspects alone, they encourage the cult of the body, wherein people who have less than perfect physiques can feel inadequate amongst others with superior ones; people even slightly overweight may feel that way, not to mention those even more so. I’m a bit overweight, and I don’t like my belly visible for all the world to see; when I go swimming with my friends, I prefer to go to a small lake, rather than to a large beach, for that reason. Granted, one can still feel self-conscious about one’s appearance even when fully dressed, but it is exacerbated by wearing swimwear that shows off far more flesh than can be seen when completely dressed – and why should people have to feel that way?

    I’m glad more modest swimsuits are increasingly available now, thanks to online sales, and I hope they become more of a trend. But I don’t think they will, other than for a minority of people, alas…

     
  16. Agapoula

    June 29, 2014 at 6:13 pm

    I just read your reply. For some reason when I comment here at patriactionary, I do not get email notification of reply. 😦 .

    Speedos can be very “not nice”, because they do show everything and it can be uncomfortable, especially if there is also children at the beach. But I suppose it is not different than a woman wearing bikini. I understand some men who go for spear fishing wear them out of necessity, to hold the fish net in the side which is difficult with a more large garment. But for casual swimmers, there is no need.

    I understand you about the cult of the body they encourage.
    But also, even if one overweight you must not worry about this. I think women are held to a higher standard in appearance, and men held to higher standard in other things. I have seen many men at beach in speedo who are maybe 300 pounds. And believe me, I do not think so much about their belly. and neither do other women if a man is in a tight speedo or swim trunks. Women do not think the same as men. Male attraction is much more visual.
    My fiance is a heavy man, and it has never been concern for me. I love his belly. 😀 .

    But despite that, even if we all have perfect bodies, it is still not modest.for non married couples to see people in speedo and bikini at the beach. 🙂 .

     
  17. Will S.

    June 29, 2014 at 6:37 pm

    Weird; I don’t know why; I get email notifications for replies. I’ll look into settings.

    Yes, women are certainly held to a higher standard, though I think women worry more than men do about their appearance; not that men can’t be critical, but we’ve all seen women obsessing about what to wear, or a body feature, while their man says, “But it looks / you look fine!” in bewilderment. (“I have nothing to wear!”, complains a woman, looking at her full closet of clothes… 🙂 )

    And yes, modesty and/or the lack thereof, is far more important of an issue as regards beachwear matters, than the other.

     
  18. Will S.

    June 30, 2014 at 11:55 am

    @ Sanne, Agapoula: American feminists are truly making boobs of themselves:

    https://patriactionary.wordpress.com/2014/06/30/the-tata-top/

     

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