RSS

Response to Mentu II: The Tale of El Gordo y El Hombre

27 May

Mentu and Ashur are engaged in the business of running a University of Man. I do not know what tuition they charge (well, actually, I do: it’s the most expensive tuition you can charge, your God-given time on Earth, and your pride, if you’re not Alpha), but I wonder if they have a mission statement that I have recently adopted: the goal of a Man is to make more Men, and everything he does is towards this purpose. I suspect that they are pursuing the same end; shame the beta month, however, is undergraduate studies in that business, and Patriactionary is here to offer the graduate level.

I promised them the following: “I will illustrate this point with another patented generalization from personal experience: the tale of El Hombre and El Gordo.” Let us now review the two categories of alpha, in the person of two acquaintances of mine.

El Gordo

El Gordo is the second-funniest man I know. This is because, even though he is a man of great wealth and high status in position and learning, he is in touch with his inner twelve-year-old. Gordo and I, when a moment of sadness overcomes us, will view the funniest minute of video ever created (ironically, I brought the video to him originally, but his analysis of it, a philosophical and scientific tract, is why we can enjoy something so crude OVER and OVER again. Really, you can watch that video 100 times in a row if you’re a man, and it will be funny EVERY SINGLE TIME.), and all will be right again with the world. Gordo has that effect on me: his boyish enthusiasm and unbridled fearlessness in life are infectious. I recall here the time when he and I were observing a product demo from a manufacturing rep of room scent enhancers. Gordo picked up one product, took a sniff, cocked a quizzical eye at me, and asked: “Pussy?” I only escaped by picking up my cellphone, holding it out prominently as if viewing a text message, and leaving the room in tears. If laughter is health-enhancing, (and it is) then Gordo has added years to my life, and they are quality years.

Gordo’s fearlessness is an adolescent quality, the sort of thing that gets boys of 17 to sign up for war, like President GHW Bush, and fly planes at 18 with real life and death risk. But his fearlessness is even greater than that. Gordo will approach ANY woman, any one. He is not a handsome man by any measure: beefy faced, thinning hair that has reached the thin stage, relatively short. He has all the handicaps that could allow a man to remain meek and fapping, but he has the greatest courage any man can have: the courage to look rejection by any woman in the face, and spit in it.

And the women respond. Since reading on body language, I have set myself apart from him as he pulls his approaches. One young woman, a butterface, shit-tested him directly. He bent her to his frame, and I mean that literally. Playful teasing, and she actually contorted her body into a shape reflecting a submissive posture to him. He could have done anything with her, despite being 30 years her senior. Another example will also illustrate. Having worked in a large company together, we had been through all the beta-izing sexual harassment trainings. Not a week after one of those, Gordo met a full-figured gal whom I had known for three years. Within 30 minutes of meeting her, her had leaned over to her and asked permission to ask a personal question. Granted, he proceeded: “How large are those puppies?”

Gordo has mentored my own approaches as well. Here I recall the one feminist woman in the office who I knew would be the hardest challenge. I was combining manosphere philosophy and mention of evolutionary psychology and she read where I was taking the issue. She rose with a shit-test to me, in front of Gordo: “Oh, so you think we should just go around barefoot, in skirts, and serving men?” I froze ever so briefly, long enough for Gordo to chime in: “You’d do that for us? Thanks, you can start tomorrow.” Classic Agree and Amplify. The woman remained in my frame, and has ceased testing me, and she and I have been much better satisfied with our working relationship. Two weeks after, she began to bring me offerings of food.

El Hombre

El Hombre is a handsome man in his 60s. Twinkling blue eyes that can go to piercing at a moment’s notice will focus on you intently. Hombre is the master, when needed, of the alpha stare. But there is also a manic quality about the man, a half-cocked crazy shit-eating grin that suggests that he’s insane enough to try something, and man enough to do it. It is corporally pervasive with him: it is not an adopted persona, it is part of every particle of his being.

Like Gordo, he is fearless in approaching women. And I have seen him get hot (8-9 class) women to bend to his will, and be willing for him to have them; I think he does it in front of me as a Professor does for a promising protege. I recall scenes from restaurants best, but the dynamic is exactly the same as in the classic Seinfeld episode “The Stall.” Watch this short clip, and see how Elaine understands female attraction where Jerry does not. Tony, Elaine’s boyfriend, is what Jerry calls a Mimbo, a male bimbo. Tony is attractive to men and women around him, as an unrestricted man pursuing his own way. Jerry says it is because he is so handsome (a classic rationalizing tactic that betas use), and Elaine insists “I would be going out with him no matter what he looked like.” Elaine is correct, because Tony’s attraction IS physical, but also because he is a Man, or at least closer to that archetype than Jerry. (In this category, consider the dialogue from the episode the cabin. George: “It’s a cabin. So what. We could build a cabin.” Jerry: “Well, two men could build a cabin.”)

George is accused of having a male crush on Tony. He acts a bit like a little girl describing Tony, and he takes on a wifely role of preparing a picnic basket and sandwiches that of course ends in disaster for Tony. When describing what Tony is like to Jerry, George talks about Tony’s interaction with the waitress: “He gets free pie!”

El Hombre has this exact quality: men want to be seen with him and bask in his power, and I have seen more than one waitress bring him free dessert or free appetizers. They do it not for the extreme tip he leaves (because they do not know he will do so), but to gain the approval of a man of clear distinction and learning. Hombre is wealthy, and has the easy manner with wealth of a man whose family has long held a high status in society; he holds the highest possible degree; he speaks three languages with the grace that I struggle with to produce in English. He leaves every person who comes into contact with him better off, or at least leaving smiling.

The Psychology of Alpha

Freud described a three-part mental system, identified as Id, Ego, and Superego. His more scientific protege, Jung, described how these three mental components are merged into the Self. In Civilization and its Discontents, Freud

enumerates what he sees as the fundamental tensions between civilization and the individual. The primary friction, he asserts, stems from the individual’s quest for instinctual freedom and civilization‘s contrary demand for conformity and instinctual repression. Many of humankind’s primitive instincts (for example, the desire to kill and the insatiable craving for sexual gratification) are clearly harmful to the well-being of a human community. As a result, civilization creates laws that prohibit killing, rape, and adultery, and it implements severe punishments if such rules are broken. This process, argues Freud, is an inherent quality of civilization that instills perpetual feelings of discontent in its citizens.

Freud’s theory is based on the notion that humans have certain characteristic instincts that are immutable. Most notable are the desires for sex, and the predisposition to violent aggression towards authoritative figures and towards sexual competitors, which both obstruct the gratification of a person’s instincts. Human beings are governed by the pleasure principle, and the pleasure principle is satisfied by the instincts.

If this description seems familiar to you, it should: it is Mentu’s view of alpha. The Alpha envisioned by Mentu is a man who ignores the restrictions on his Id-driven impulses that society demands. What Mentu calls a beta we can now explain: this is a man whose Superego so thoroughly overwhelms his Id and Ego that the primitive impulses of the Id never come to the surface. Mentu is correct about this: Alpha REQUIRES Id, and a man with a suppressed Id will never be alpha.

But Mentu is wrong about Id: it is a NECESSARY, but not a sufficient, condition for Alpha. The alpha Man is not just an unrestrained Id. He is a complete self, with a superego governing and modulating those impulses of Id that do not lead to long-term success, or are at conflict with the interests of the group or tribe, where a Man holds his status. The Man has conquered his most difficult opponent, himself, and fears no lesser foe. He is a Man in full.

Gordo, Hombre, and the Alpha Man

Gordo is Id, personified. His fearlessness in approach is matched by his lack of restraint in the other areas. In deadly sins, Gluttony is the sibling of Lust: both are excessive expressions of what are fundamentally good drives created by God for man’s happiness. Gordo is fat, but he makes no bones about it. He will tell you that the most dangerous place to be is between him and a salad bar. He will eat a large dinner of factory-farmed grain-fattened beef, follow it a large dessert, and then tell everyone how he is going to cruelly send down one overmatched Lipitor to deal with the whole mess. The day he does get in to the hospital for the onrushing heart attack, he will nevertheless leave each doctor laughing.

Hombre is slim for his age, with good posture. He likes his whiskey and will smoke a ciggy or two, but he can take either or leave them. In table manners, he will order what he wants, but will leave large amounts of an oversized American portion on his plate. He has control over his food and his cravings: he will take a drink, but will avoid drunkenness.

One last comparative example. Gordo will literally approach any woman, and he does not believe in a fat girl jihad. He dispenses the privilege of his male gaze on the deserving and the undeserving alike. Hombre is polite to all, but only turns on the charm to women whose ability to control their eating shows that they, too, are in control of their bodies, and that they are worthy of pursuit and long-term relationship.

In looking over these two men, I would call both Alpha. But Gordo’s Alpha is a different kind. He might best be termed an aloof asshole. Hombre, by contrast, epitomizes amused mastery, a higher level of alpha. An aloof asshole doesn’t give a f*ck, but an amused master has moved past that stage. He knows not to let the little things bother him, and that the job of a Man is to make more Men, and to radiate that masculine power through the society around him to his benefit, and that society’s benefit. It should be no surprise that Hombre’s wealth is derived from his entrepreneurial activity, improving the lives of his once thousands of employees. He epitomizes the alpha behavior of the Patriarch, the end goal of all men.

 
29 Comments

Posted by on May 27, 2012 in Game, Masculinity

 

29 responses to “Response to Mentu II: The Tale of El Gordo y El Hombre

  1. Will S.

    May 27, 2012 at 11:43 pm

    I know which of your two men I would look up to more, definitely the Hombre.

     
  2. electricangel1978

    May 28, 2012 at 1:12 pm

    Yes, but it would take longer to meet Hombre, and he would have to choose YOU. Trad Catholics talk about a quiverfull, and I think that’s Hombre’s approach. Find worthy younger men to mentor, cast his wheat upon fertile soil, and stand back and reap the harvest. He has urged me for a year to start a business with him, and he has slowly worn down my reticence. I am pretty certain that I will; I can finally “see” it.

    Gordo is a classic extrovert. (I now realize I need to write the follow-up to this post, called “The Making of Greater and Lesser Alphas.”) IF you were not good on approach, you would learn it by constant watching of him. The funny thing is, Gordo looks up to me, and has told me several times how few people are playing with the “cannon” that I carry in my head. I cannot make him as smart as I am, and he cannot make me as extroverted as he is, but I have learned my sociability largely at his hands, and he has learned to multiply his intelligence using the proper electronic tools from me.

     
  3. Will S.

    May 28, 2012 at 1:29 pm

    “(I now realize I need to write the follow-up to this post, called “The Making of Greater and Lesser Alphas.”)”

    So you do! 🙂

     
  4. Jennifer

    May 28, 2012 at 10:03 pm

    Gordo’s mannerisms sound disgusting, but it’s good he’s no hypocrite or whiner. Hombre would be very admirable if he had no preoccupation for bending women to sexual pliancy. A person with a strong will’s ultimate success depends on what they direct that will to.

     
  5. Will S.

    May 28, 2012 at 11:24 pm

    Jennifer, ALL straight men intend to bend women to sexual pliancy; marriage is based in large part on the ability of a man to bend one particular woman to his will in that, in terms of her willingness to commit the rest of her life to him, and submit to him, even as he similarly commits to her – that is the Biblical model. In the right context, such abilities of men are godly and admirable; and yet we may also admire the skill of the rogue, even as we detach ourselves from consenting to his activities. Of course, I know that’s impossible for you as a woman, but that’s how we menfolk think. Deal with it.

     
  6. Will S.

    May 28, 2012 at 11:29 pm

    @ EA: You know, your description of Hombre puts me in mind of The Most Interesting Man in the World:

     
  7. Jennifer

    May 28, 2012 at 11:40 pm

    Generally speaking, if a woman loves a man and is attracted to him, she won’t need to be bent to sexual pliancy. I know many men admire the rogue, at least the non-fathers, and I’m used to it.

     
  8. electricangel1978

    May 28, 2012 at 11:49 pm

    @Will,

    Hombre has the same air about him. Except he’s not surrounded by two women at all times. He has a loyal court whenever I have seen him at table; he parcels out the power among them, and expects it to be returned to him, tenfold. It works.

    @Jennifer,
    Gordo would have you laughing within a minute, and set the hook. He is faithfully married, but I think he likes to know he can have pretty much any woman. Qui audet adipiscitur, and all that.

     
  9. Will S.

    May 28, 2012 at 11:51 pm

    Jennifer, if a woman truly loves a man, i.e. falls hard for him, and loves him for him, not merely for what he’ll do for her life, she’ll willingly bend to his frame, and submit, particularly if he is dominant. It is the nature of women to do so, in general. Maybe not radical egalitarian women who are so spooked by the extreme case of the Duggars that they flee the opposite direction in over-reaction, but ordinary women.

    Even married fathers admire the rogue; James Bond movies were and are popular with men of all ages and life stages, from young single guys, to middle-aged and older, married men.

     
  10. Jennifer

    May 28, 2012 at 11:58 pm

    He could not have me, electric, but I may find him quite engaging. Unless he insults me physically; I don’t even like gay men thinking they can make familiar remarks just because they’re girly.

    “Jennifer, if a woman truly loves a man, i.e. falls hard for him, and loves him for him, not merely for what he’ll do for her life, she’ll willingly bend”

    Exactly, she’ll choose to commit, not have someone else bend her; the admirable men are those who inspire such commitment. By “rogue”, though, I basically meant man-whore and not much else; I hope Bond was more than that, but haven’t seen the films. My type of rogue is Robin Hood, Maximus, Sparticus, not the Tucker Max type, say.

     
  11. Will S.

    May 29, 2012 at 12:01 am

    I agree that the Robin Hood type is much more noble than the Tucker Max type, certainly. Interestingly, even Tucker Max eventually tired of his lifestyle, and has given it up. It gets old…

     
  12. Jennifer

    May 29, 2012 at 12:03 am

    Whoa, Tucker gave it up??? When?
    [EA: Upset some? 😉 ]

     
  13. Will S.

    May 29, 2012 at 12:06 am

    Some months ago.

     
  14. Jennifer

    May 29, 2012 at 12:09 am

    Wow, something new every day. Well, good for him.

    Have a good evening.

     
  15. Will S.

    May 29, 2012 at 12:11 am

    You too, Jennifer.

     
  16. electricangel1978

    May 29, 2012 at 12:43 am

    @jennifer,

    Exactly, she’ll choose to commit, not have someone else bend her;
    Attraction is not a choice. We do not have free will, but we do have “free won’t.” You can choose not to act on the impulses that bubble up from the unconscious, but you cannot stop their generation.

    Once you yield to the temptation, you will literally do ANYTHING to keep that person. It’s how Patty Hearst, for one, went bad. Ask the women who killed for Charles Manson why they did it. A woman under the sway of an alpha surrenders control: he bends her to his will.

    Try it some time and see.

     
  17. Will S.

    May 29, 2012 at 12:52 am

    Spot on, EA. Listen to him, Jennifer; he speaks truth!

    BTW, EA: “We do not have free will, but we do have “free won’t.” ”

    How Augustinian of you. Why, if I didn’t know better, I’d almost think you’d become Calvinist like me! 😉

    [EA That, or a reader of Psychology Today]

     
  18. katmandutu

    May 29, 2012 at 2:22 am

    “Once you yield to the temptation, you will literally do ANYTHING to keep that person. It’s how Patty Hearst, for one, went bad. Ask the women who killed for Charles Manson why they did it. A woman under the sway of an alpha surrenders control: he bends her to his will.”

    No, Patty Hearst was a victim of Stockholm Syndrome, EA, where the victim (male or female) becomes completely dependent on their captor.

    The term, Stockholm Syndrome, was coined in the early 70’s to describe the puzzling reactions of four bank employees to their captor. On August 23, 1973, three women and one man were taken hostage in one of the largest banks in Stockholm. They were held for six days by two ex-convicts who threatened their lives but also showed them kindness. To the world’s surprise, all of the hostages strongly resisted the government’s efforts to rescue them and were quite eager to defend their captors. Indeed, several months after the hostages were saved by the police, they still had warm feelings for the men who threatened their lives. Two of the women eventually got engaged to the captors.
    [EA I think you’ve described some of the tactics that “Dark Alpha” men will use to gain psychotic control of their women, Kathy. Be glad God has never put that particular temptation in front of you!]

    As for Manson he was a psychopath.He was described by probation reports as suffering from a ‘marked degree of rejection, instability and psychic trauma’ and ‘constantly striving for status and securing some kind of love’. Other descriptions included ‘dangerous’ ‘unpredictable’ and ‘safe only under supervision’.

    Hardly Alpha..
    [EA Google Dark Triad. Or, better yet, read this. Women are perverse: that’s why men love them.]

    Manson reflects personality traits and obsessions that are associated with gurus of cult-quasi-religious groups that began to emerge in the 60’s and are still with us today. He was pathologically deluded into believing that he was harbinger of doom regarding the planet’s future, in much the same way that cult and evangelist figures today claim prophetic knowledge of the world’s end. LSD and other drugs played havoc with his mind.

    Most normal women would see nothing attractive about such a man. [EA Most normal women can suppress their attraction to such men. That is the critical difference.] Most of the women that Manson attracted were young women who had troubled lives. Problems with their home life, and who were rebellious .

    Remember. Water seeks its own level.

    Which is why women who have very high partner counts usually marry men with similar counts. 😉

     
  19. Will S.

    May 29, 2012 at 8:40 am

    Kathy, Manson was charismatic, and charming to women, apparently. The fact he was crazy, and evil, doesn’t mean he didn’t have Alpha traits. Many bad boys do. Alpha does not mean good. It just means self-confident and able to influence others, particularly women.

    And I’m not so sure women with high partner counts always marry men with similar. In fact, we have certainly heard of women who, having finished riding the carousel, have sought out ‘nice guys’, whether out of genuine repentance for what they’ve done and a desire to turn away from the kind of guys they sought the attention of, before, towards those who they know would be better for them, or whether because they know many nice guys are schmucks, who will be more forgiving towards them as they age and their looks deteriorate, and just so happy to be with a woman that they’re willing to overlook her past, or naively delude themselves into thinking she has none.

     
  20. katmandutu

    May 29, 2012 at 9:05 am

    Come on Will. The guy was a nut,. His mind was drug addled.. He was not charming.. He was not charismatic. He had problems from the get go. Troubled childhood. Never knew his father.. Go read up on him. He attracted damaged and troubled women.. Like attracts like. Psychopaths draw weak people in.. We should not conflate Alpha qualities with those of a psychopath.. Of course Manson had some masculine qualities. He was a man after all.

    He’s a very poor example of Alpha.

    And from what I have read, yes, people with high partner counts usually(though not always) end up with similar people.
    [EA Gonna need a cite on this, K. It has an intuitive sense, of course, except for men. I would think a high-partner-count man would be less likely to marry, given his knowledge of female nature.]

    Stands to reason don’t you think?

    I certainly did not marry a man who had slept with many women..

    And I know many other women who did not as well. (They themselves of course being virgins or having only one or two partners)

     
  21. Will S.

    May 29, 2012 at 9:18 am

    @ Kathy: Of course he was a nut. And indeed, the women he attracted had problems. But Alpha is not a moral judgment, but an observation about ability to attract and lead others, whether for good or ill. I am in no wise an admirer of Manson; quite the contrary. But he wouldn’t have been able to do the damage he did, if he couldn’t get others to follow him. Hitler was Alpha, having the ability to mesmerize with his rhetoric; he got an entire nation to buy his delusion – and lots of women wanted him, though he stuck with only one, Eva Braun – who stayed with him despite his impotence… Alpha traits and morality do not necessarily correlate.

    Yes, many people with high partner counts will end up with others with high partner counts. In long-term relationships, but not always in marriage. And sometimes, people with high partner counts will nevertheless seek out those with lower. Men certainly do, and increasingly, women are doing so, too.

     
  22. katmandutu

    May 29, 2012 at 9:45 am

    “But he wouldn’t have been able to do the damage he did, if he couldn’t get others to follow him.”

    Of course! But these were like minded damaged people (men followed him as well) Most normal women were not attracted to him.

    This was a psycopath.. Not some PUA Alpha..

    In any event I tire of this Alpha attraction nonsense..

    I never married an Alpha, just a good man who I thought was kinda cute, when I met him. Honest, nice guy with similar interests to me.

    There was a spark. We got on like a house on fire. He had a wicked sense of humour..We fell in love.. Shit, Alpha was unheard of back then..
    He is who he is.

    He is a strong man who just wont’ put up with crap..

    A good hearted and kind man..

    Nevertheless,(to give you an example) the other day when I was going on about something that he had told me,(and he could not get a word in) he just fixed me with a steely gaze and calmly but firmly said.. “Just shut up and listen”

    So, I did. 🙂

     
  23. Will S.

    May 29, 2012 at 9:55 am

    Attaboy, Kathy’s hubby. You done good, woman, in marrying him. 🙂

     
  24. Sis

    May 29, 2012 at 10:12 pm

    What excellent role models if your goals are power, sex and pleasure.
    [EA You forgot a comma.]

     
  25. electricangel1978

    May 29, 2012 at 11:18 pm

    @Kathy,

    There was a spark. We got on like a house on fire. He had a wicked sense of humour..We fell in love.. Shit, Alpha was unheard of back then..

    I think you were attracted to him, and many other men. You had the good sense to choose a man whose long-term prospects were better, and balance Id-impulses with Superego-control. Well done.

     
  26. electricangel1978

    May 29, 2012 at 11:22 pm

    @Sis,
    What excellent role models if your goals are power, sex and pleasure.

    Both men are faithfully married for over 25 years each. Hombre better interprets the spirit of Christian charity, the effort to improve all he comes in touch with, and restore it to the perfect state that God intended.

     
  27. Will S.

    May 30, 2012 at 6:02 pm

    @ EA: Like your bolded responses to people in their comments. 🙂

     

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s